A Galimaufry of Musings

There is little of canal life this time as, unfortunately, the bad back remains a bad back despite the ministrations of fizzio and medico and I am, as the Bard would have said, totally buggered. Pam has been saintly and I am blessed in that I can sit, sleep and drive without pain, though obviously not at the same time. Standing, walking and climbing stairs are hell so the boat is not a lot of good albeit sans stairs. It was bearable up till last Sunday but has got much worse since then. Oh sod it -who wants to read about my boring back.

I'm fine but not been to the boat this week preferring reading a lot and doing crosswords

A Bit of History
I was interested to read the following from the Berkhamsted Local History & Museum Society:

Water water everywhere...

"Since last week the water in the reservoirs near Tring rose 4.5 feet. The water in Grand Junction Canal also rose considerably and the pumping at the Cow Roast was discontinued, being unnecessary. At Northchurch, where a number of the wells had been sunk lower, the springs rose, and they had well water, waterworks water, and plenty of raw water. At Berkhampstead, St. John's well spring has recommenced to run; the watercress beds are covered where they had been quite dry before. During last week some 200 yards of road from Tring to the station were under several feet of water through a drain being stopped." (Bucks Herald, Oct 1891).

Last Winter was pretty wet as we all recall but this was in October,1891 and wont have aided the harvest gathering. It still remains very mild and we have had a fair bit of rain. Are we in for another wet one I wonder?  Being purely selfish I'd rather have a wet mild Winter but feel for people whose homes are at risk.

Some more history:
Friend Geoffrey lent me a book of photos (Bygone Berkhamsted by Percy Birtchnell) and it included the following picture. Eddy Street runs alongside the row of cottages in Gossoms End including Pam's house.(third in from the horses) East were a big business in Berko once upon a time building all sorts of stuff including lock gates , lance poles, rammers for the artillery and tent pegs all for the Crimean War! Well, not the lock gates obviously.
The horses look very much like my selections at Huntingdon this week although these appear to be going faster.

And yet more history....

This picture, also from the above mentioned Percy Birtchnell shows a cycle and motor shop on the corner of Holliday Street and High St Berko. I posed the question as to whether the street was named after the Hollidays who owned the shop and it looks like that family had a wheelwrights there; going back into the mid 1800s and that an early member of the family had been a bailiff at Ashlyns Hall so I reckon I'm probably right.

However for me the more interesting fact was detailed by Percy B under the following photo.

Thomas Stevens

I was so impressed by this fellow Thomas Stevens that I've ordered Vol 1 of his account of his trip and am saving for Vol 2. After all the above he then went on to manage the Garrick Theatre so nuff respec as we say in downtown Berkhamsted. I am sure this would make a great film; a man born in Berko, educated at a charity school, emigrates to America, farms in Wisconsi, rides a pennyfaerthing round the world, returns to Berko, gets married and manages the Garrick. Job done.

To more important matters. Pam has been suffering an influx of half dead wasps and it was suspected that one point of entry (amongst a few others) was the skylight in the living room. In order to eliminate this as an option Pam and Joseph are seen here clingfilming the skylight

None so far but they are coming from somewhere

So Pam amused herself by chopping down some ivy-doesn't she look happy.

Saturday night and it's curry at Berkhamsted Boys School in aid of Save the Children. A splendid evening with a murder mystery enacted on stage during dinner which I was completely incapable of understanding.(The play, not the dinner) The back was bearable for the outing but Sunday took it's revenge

They Sikh him here.......






                                 in the Lamb

With Maharishi Andrew and Jane who seemed to be the main motivation behind the evening

The ladies parade theirIndian costumes

They Sikh him there......

Anyway the evening raised at least 400 quid with a raffle and I expect a few bob more. Good effort all round.
We returned to Maharishi Andrew's after the event and enjoyed coffee and brandy before retiring hurt.

Talking of social gatherings the Cowroast Lock Moorers Christmas Gathering will be on Dec 6th so if you normally attend make a note..

The week ahead depends very much on the state of my back but a trip to Kent to see Caz, Phillip and Florence is planned So it's back to my cheese and cocodomol sandwich. Yummy.....................and Fulham are winning 2-0. Rejoice.

October ramblings of a man with a bad back

Those of you waiting with bated breath for news of my back/hip will be sorry to learn that I still have it....the pain I mean. Obviously I still have the back and hip. Been generally buggered for last few days and "caning the charpoy" as we used to say in India. Anyway fizzio booked for  Monday and hope it's sortable

1. (Charpoy:a bedstead of woven webbing or hemp stretched on a wooden frame on four legs, common in India)

The weather  (Monday) is the perfect weather for staying in bed till 2pm and feeling manly about the pain. The weather is atrocious and trying to ger the sodding fire going when one's hip is hapless aint no fun. Managed it though and there is nothing like an open fire to cheer an old boater- better than a rub down with the Sporting Life

The perfect antidote to a hopeless, hipless, hapless day

The Blessed Pam has done some shopping for me so Fish'n'chips tonight. Deep joy.

Yesterday, Sunday, was a beautiful day though a bloody cold morning. Took the camera with me as I limped down the towpath and there were some great cobwebs.

Sadly, all is not beauty. Opposite my mooring a dosser boat has moved on leaving his rubbish. When I'm Queen dosser boaters leaving rubbish will be made to buy Fulham Season Tickets. That'll cure it.

Inconsiderate Git

Further north about half a mile (by Bridge 138) all is not well in the Bench dept of Canal and River Trust. Now if you've a dodgy hip,back,leg,foot, whatever then a bench can be a welcome sight. There is a bench by Cowroast Lock which was similarly knackered which we (Cowroast Lock Moorers and chum, Geoff) restored in memory of our late friend Sid to whom we dedicated the bench complete with brass plaque. Perhaps we should do something with this one.......

Changing the subject slightly this picture was published on  Facebook 

German exchange students assisting Berkhamsted School pupils unloading a narrowboat with materials for a new playing field. Grand Union Canal by the Moor . April 1936

Sad to think that 3 years later they'd be killing one another. Any of my boating friends got an idea on the identity of the craft?

A BIT OF BACKGROUND if anyone's interested

AYLESBURY-BASED CANAL CARRIERS:
THE LANDONS AND A. HARVEY-TAYLOR

THE Aylesbury firm of John Landon & Co. were coal merchants who also ran a small fleet of horse-drawn narrow boats from the Basin; according to a trade directory for 1852, they even operated a weekly “fly-boat” service to London.  Taken at face value, this suggests there remained – after the railway had creamed off most of it – sufficient high-value trade to justify an express canal service:

“CONVEYANCE BY WATER: To LONDON, William and John Landon’s Fly Boats, from Aylesbury wharf, Walton St, every Saturday.”

Slater’s Directory, 1852.

By 1869, the Landon’s non-stop fly-boat service had been replaced by still faster “canal steamboats” operated by the Grand Junction Canal Carrying Establishment, John Landon now being their agent:

“WATER CONVEYANCE. London, Birmingham, & all parts of the kingdom, by canal steamboats; Grand Junction Canal Company; John Landon, agent. Goods delivered in London at the ‘White Horse,’ Cripplegate, & at 30 Wharf, City Road basin.”

Kelly’s Directory, 1869.

    In 1876, the Grand Junction Carrying Establishment ceased trading.  Landons continued in the business, although no more offering a service to “Birmingham & all parts of the kingdom”; the firm’s advertisement in Bradshaw’s Canals and Navigable Rivers(1904) offered merely a service “between London and Aylesbury and towns en route”.  Incoming cargoes would have supplied the various businesses around the Basin, but other than condensed milk, the return journey would probably have depended on anything that could be collected along the way, such as animal feed and straw from along the Arm and perhaps building aggregates from the many pits below Rickmansworth.

    Landon’s business was taken over in 1923 by Arthur Harvey-Taylor, who enlarged the all-wooden fleet by having craft constructed at local boat building yards (Costins at Berkhamsted, and Bushell Bros. at Gamnel).  The firm dominated the carrying trade on the Aylesbury Arm for some 30 years.  Coal was their major business, the firm supplying amongst other concerns Nestlé’s, the Aylesbury power station, the Aylesbury Steam Laundry and, further afield, John Dickenson’s various canal-side factories and that of A. Wander & Co. (makers of Ovaltine) at Kings Langley, as well as domestic consumers.  Large customers for other goods included Mead’s Flour Mill at Gamnel Wharf and Garside’s sand quarry at Leighton Buzzard.

 

A pair of Harvey-Taylor narrow boats in Tring Cutting.  Note the telegraph poles ― selling wayleave to telecommunications companies provided a useful source of revenue to canal companies from the 1860s onward.  On this section, a fibre optic highway was installed during the 1990s. Sunday school outing in a pair of Harvey-Taylor narrow boats, 1931. Reproduced by kind permission of Miss Catherine Bushell.

Enough history. But if you want more.... http://gerald-massey.org.uk/Canal/d_aylesbury_arm.htm

Tuesday, 7th Oct.

Hip still very restricting in wanting to sort boat stuff etc. At least it's sunny and a good day for a walk.The cut is busy today probably because anyone who didn't have to move yesterday will have stayed moored with a good fire, a crate of Guiness and a good book. Today they are all moving. 

I see from notices posted that the bridge over the canal at Cowroast Lock is going to have some work done. The old girl certainly needs some tlc as various bits have fallen off. 

Wednesday and out of reverence to my non-improving back I've ordered a new mattress for the boat. Means some minor carpentry work to fit it in but nothing an old bodger can't handle.

Thursday and changeable weather-very Octoberish. Bought myself a snugglybuggly hot water bottle to assist the back. 

Pam has booked tickets for a charity do next week for Save the Children. It's an Indian meal at the Berko Boys' School and those that want to dress up can do so. Can't resist going as Ghandi though some unkind types might have hinted that the physique is inappropriate. Watch this space.

Oh and it's a Murder Mystery evening. Great Fun.

Talking of Pam and charity she recently did one of these Ice Bucket Challenges 

 https://www.facebook.com/video.php?v=10203888878615770

on behalf of

http://www.mndassociation.org/get-involved/donations

Feel free to donate and reward Pam for one of the sillier things she's done.

Fabulous full moon last night and so clear that I thought there would be a helluva frost. Courtesy of the back I didn't get out of bed till 10 so no sign when I surfaced.

But this pretty little fellow came poncing bread

Talking of bread I was a little worried t'other day to discover that having bought bread at the Farm Shop I had then bought some more at Tesco forgetting the first purchased 10 minutes before. (Happy Ducks).
 Is this the beginning of my demise into daftness or have I always been an idiot. Discuss.

Roy, my boating neighbour, arrived Thursday evening. He is moving a boat from Braunston to Cowroast over the  next few days and I had hoped to assist but there will need to be a major improvement in the back dept. Very frustrating. We enjoyed a tonic in the Cowroast and then I retired to my boat for fish pie ( a specialite de la maison) and watched England win 5-0 against the mighty San Marino
To bed with the new hot water bottle.
Sleep would not come so I compiled one of my mental lists; this one is to name three England capped players starting with each letter of the alphabet. I was asleep by Joe Hart. I woke at 6 a m wondering if there had ever been a Wall capped for England.

Behold!
My only disappointment was that he played for Man Utd but it was a different world.
Note they bought him for £175 and sold him to Oldham for £200. Shrewd even then. He also had to work in the docks after his career finished playing for the Manchester Ship Canal! Oh how times have changed.

• George Wall was born in Bolden Colliery, near Sunderland, on 20th February 1885. A talented outside left he played local football for Boldon Royal Rovers, Whitburn and Jarrow.
  In November 1903 Wall joined Barnsley. After he scored 24 goals in 75 games he was sold to Manchester United for £175 in April 1906. Manchester United went on to win the title by nine points. Wall finished as second top scorer with 19 goals.

  
  

  On 18th March 1907, George Wall won his first international cap for England against Wales. The following year he played in England's 3-1 victory over Ireland.

  Wall also won a FA Cup winners medal for Manchester United in April 1909. He also played in three games for England that year. This included him scoring two goals in the victory over Scotland.

  In the The United Alphabet Garth Dykes describes Wall as "very fast, tricky, and had a wonderful knack of cutting inside and shooting when least expected... he was also a superbly accurate crosser of the ball".

  
  

  Wall and Manchester United  won two championships in four years.

  During the First World War George Wall served in the Black Watch Regiment joining up in 1915.He played for England 7 times and but for the war would havbe played more. After the war he was sold to Oldham Athletic for £200. While at Manchester United he had scored 89 goals in 287 league games.

  Wall also played for Rochdale in the 1922-23 season. While working in the docks he played for the Manchester Ship Canal team about whom I know nothing.

  George Wall died in Manchester in 1962 aged 77.
  Having watched England's sparkling victory over Estonia (1-0 )I wonder what George would make of today's set up.

Enough for now. Tomorrow is Fizzio day and I hope that will bring some improvement

Now you can all sleep soundly.No need to count sheep. Just re-read this blog.
zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Poetry, a To Do List and the Fish Theory

This is a short blog. A blogette. It is prompted by National Poetry Day and by a posting on Facebook by a friend regarding an health issue .

Thursday, 2nd Oct, I am told by Radio 4, is National Poetry Day.

Those of you who could be arsed to read the last posting will recall mention was made of Great Linford and the mooring where my last pig, Twirly of Blessed Memory, met his end; swept off the roof by a branch.

I publish below the touching Elegy that I wrote at the time

"RIP

Twirly the Pig

Sad to report poor Twirly is dead

At rest forever on a canal bed.

And there for now poor Twirly must lie

Proof pigs can’t swim nor can they fly.

Knocked off in his prime and God-forsaken

For carp and minnow-Grand Union bacon

The canal bottom is now his pillow

Despatched down there by a ****ing willow"

(An elegy is a poem, song, or other work of art composed as a lament for someone who has died. A eulogyis a speech or written tribute praising someone who had died, especially one composed for that person’s funeral. Unlike elegy, which is often used figuratively or to describe a work of art with a mournful tone (and it gives rise to the adjective elegiac, meaning mournful), eulogy is almost always used literally.)

And here is my effort for today which I texted to all my friends. Both of them like it.

"I've been moving coal this morning

And sorting logs for Winter

I should have put my gloves on

Cos now I've got a splinter.

I've got it in my index

A bad finger to have chose

Cos now I'm ruined for the day

And cannot pick my nose"

Enough poetry for now.

I woke this morning in a good mood. Despite a pain in my hip, which is unusual,** I am happy. The Mighty Fulham won 4-0 last night and are off the bottom of the table. The sun doth shine and for the 2nd of October it is pleasantly warm. As usual the list of jobs I prepared yesterday remains largely unfinished and the forecast tells me I should think "heating" by the weekend so the list can wait.

My wood shed is full and I have six bags of coal. Jules' Fuels will top up my diesel for the central heating by mid October. So today I gave the multi fuel stove a treat and moved some of the coal and wood closer to the boat. Over the next week I shall fit my cratch cover (that'a the bit that goes over the front well). I didn't bother last Winter cos it's a bit of a faff and regretted my idleness. Not only is it additional insulation but it's also somewhere dry to store fuel.

** The pain in my hip is unusual, not the hip, as I don't normally have a pain there. It just gives further credence to my long held theory of the fish which is now, more or less, universally accepted throughout the medical profession. Well, those with receptive minds anyway.
The Fish Theory is explained in greater detail at the end of this post.

I digress. Where was I?
Ah yes.
The imminent onset of wet weather only emphasises what a wonderful Summer we've had.

We've had some cracking sunsets here at Cowroast. I don't seem to get up in time for a sunrise though as the days get shorter the sunrise will  soon be the same time as I haul my fish-ridden form from the pit.
Not this morning (Fri 3rd) though.
Today's list.
1 re-attach hosepipe to water tap-done
2 take rusty useless bike to tip-nearly done
3 get car cleaned as it still bears the dust from a sandstorm in Coventry-done
4 post Ollie's birthday card (for 6th)-which should also be a getweller as he had knee surgery yesterday in Bristol. Which was handy (or should that be kneedy?) as that was where he was and they did it while he waited. All the best Ollie.-done
5 attempt to start generator which messed me about on holiday.=Failed
6 clean cratch cover= Nearly
7 Tell the world about the Fish Theory

A friend from Norfolk on Facebook writes
"Well I say hip pain....the GP says trochanteric bursitis and here's some painkillers. I say ....and there's also the foot....he says I'll inject it now.....I squeal and nearly pass out.....he says goodbye. The caring side of the NHS all in 6 minutes"

This is a classic example of why people need to be aware or the Fish Theory. Had this major advance in medical thinking reached Norfolk then the quack would not have bothered with injections in the foot. If they had waited a day  the pain would have been somewhere else

Read and Learn

The Fish Theory

1/We all have at least on fish in our body
2/It is obviously very small
3/But it is too big to swim in the veins of young people because they have very small veins
4/As people get older their veins get bigger  allowing the fish to move about
5/ This is why as you get older you get more pains and when you are young you don't get much pain until your veins get bigger. These are called growing pains.
6/ If, say, you eat too much vein blocking food (called yummy) then the fish gets frustrated and angry cos it can't move about and gets trapped like a goldfish in a bowl. Thus angered  it bangs off the stomach walls. This is called Irritable Bowl Syndrome.
7/ And sometimes the fish gets caught in one bit elsewhere in the system and totally buggers that bit up. This is called "dead"
8/But for most of your adult (i.e. over 50) life the fish is free to move about and wherever it settles down for the night that is the bit that hurts.
9/ That is why when you wake up in the morning it's a different bit that hurts than the bit that hurt yesterday
10/ If you keep yourself fit then that allows the fish to lay eggs and so that is why fit people get more pain later on cos they have more fish.
11/ People that don't keep fit only have one angry frustrated and trapped fish (see 6 and 7 above ).
12/There are obviously some pains that are not due to fish such as having babies, breaking an arm and rubbing your eye after chopping chillis. What a rotten day that was.
13/ All major religions believe when you die that your sole goes to heaven where, if you believe in Cod, he has reserved a plaice for you.
14 Except for those who believe when you die you are reincarnated as a shellfish. These are Prawn Again Christians.

Now 1 to 14 above might, I hope,  seem the ramblings of a drink addled mind but before dismissing them out of hand consider the following scientifically proven facts.

The body comprises  65%  water so is the perfect environment for......fish. 
The brain is composed of 70 per cent water (leaving 30% for whisky), and the lungs are nearly 90 per cent water. About 83 per cent of our blood is water, which helps digest our food, transport waste AND FISH, and control body temperature. 


The Anglo Saxon word for pain was haedorch from which we derived the word headache. According to Prof Helmut Krasch,  Lecturer in Linguistics, University of Crawley nr Gatwick  "Haedorch" was also the Viking word for haddock.

Have you ever woken up with a stiff neck (unless caused by not swallowing your Viagra pill quickly enough) only to find that by lunchtime it's your coccyx that hurts.It's probably the fish moving unless your braces are a bit taut.

Have you ever wondered why as you get older you do something energetic like dig the garden, go for a long walk or do without the tv remote for an evening the stiffness that you know will ensue doesn't arrive for 48 hours? This is because the fish, like you (and I'm sure they do) are getting older and can't get to the acheybits as quickly as they once did.

The Fish Theory has been mocked by some but most of the medical experts I've met have given it their blessing, nodding sagely, looking qizzically at one another and saying "Yes Michael" . Very reassuring. Although yet to be approved by NICE I hope that you all feel wiser for learning about the Fish Theory. Mind you why the medical grandees need the approval of a biscuit I do not know.

Some doctors will tell you to ignore the above yet at the same time urge you to eat more fish high in Omega Oil. This will only make your watch run smoothly.

I should have been a doctor but unfortunately I can't stand the sight of blood, especially mine, and I hate sick people so that profession was closed to me.

Anyway I've got one of my haddocks coming on and must lie down for a while.

Bye bye.